When the Rut Becomes the Road

You know you're stuck deep into habit when it has simply become your personality - who you are.  Deep, deep habit is when the rut BECOMES the road.

Odd That It Took So Long

I was on a particular spiritual path for over 22 years, since I was in college. And there were many gifts on that path, but ultimately I left. And when people ask me why I left after so much time and dedication, after so much effort and commitment, I have finally understood that it was, more than anything else, because I was bored out of my mind. Odd that it took so long to realize.

Technique

As I teach more and more, the question of technique inevitably arises.  What technique should I follow to achieve peace of mind?  What approach should I use to experience a more gentle heart.  What should my practice be?

And I am a bit at a loss, because this isn't about doing something, it's about being something, and I don't know how to tell someone that.  There are countless religions, practices, philosophies, concepts, books, organizations and speakers dedicated to telling people how to do something.

And from what I can see, they mostly draw from the same ancient wisdom we've had access to for thousands of years, and re-package it in the language of the day, communicating truth and understanding as old as the earth with new words and images, trying to convey meaning and connection, giving new form to familiar content.

I don't know about technique.  I've tried so many, being disciplined and obedient, and felt always the hollow shell the technique confining me and stifling me, giving me access to one thing at the expense of every other thing.

I'm not looking for a quick trick to share, a set of steps to follow.  I don't know the technique to being more fully one's truest, deepest, most powerful self, and I'm pretty sure it's a lot bigger than that. Disillusioned practitioners reach the outer limits of the benefits of technique all the time, and then are faulted for failing the technique.

Direction is good.  Awareness and attention are good.  Acceptance and compassion are good.  But they are not magic tricks to master.  They require effort of the most intimate and fearless nature.

For those needing technique, I say go and find the one that suits you best.  There is no shortage of them.  But don't confuse the technique with the real work, don't confuse mastering technique with becoming a master.

Knowing When to Stop

When you get tired of beating your head against a wall, maybe just stop doing that.  Maybe step away from the wall and stop using your head as some kind of weapon. There is no virtue in self-destruction, and doing it in the name of determination, persistence or courage doesn't make it work better.

Missing the Point

By focusing completely on goals, you crowd out the infinite possibility awaiting you, better than any goal, and then wonder why there is so much force, anxiety and tiredness in your efforts.

Over-Focusing

Over-focusing on things of the heart can make us too vulnerable and soft. Over-focusing on things of the mind can make us too sharp and dry. The balance of head and heart creates rich, fertile soil in the soul, a fertile garden where the seeds of change can take root and ultimately bear fruit in our lives.

Grief

When death comes, there is no getting over it or moving on from the people we love, who have danced through the landscape of our souls, shaping and molding us with their love and presence. Maybe all we can do is cherish the best of the memories, and live life in honor of everything good we shared, and continue the legacy of that goodness. And maybe the pain and sorrow don't diminish, but that there's room for joy in the midst of it still, the kind of joy their memory keeps alive.

Curiosity

Curiosity is essential on the spiritual journey. Curiosity can take us further than courage, ambition, determination and will power, and keep us lighthearted in the process. An open heart requires a curious mind.

Resonsibility

When you are responsible for something, but abdicate that responsibility, and then find yourself disappointed by those who did not handle said responsibility well, you must turn to yourself for blame. You cannot criticize them for doing poorly what you should have done well.

Freedom of Choice

You are not actually required to re-act to everything that happens around you. It's just find to do nothing, wait, think about your next step, and maybe even then, still do nothing. Freedom of choice lies in action, not re-action.

Overcoming Fear

When the concerning circumstances all around us pull me toward disappointment and fear, I remind myself that the only way I can make a real difference in the world is by the person I choose to be and the life I create for myself. I remind myself this every second of every date lately, and it always helps.

Spiritual Experience

You don't have a soul; you are a soul. And spirituality isn't a class or an experience; it's day-to-day life shaped by that knowledge.

The Power of Purpose

There is great power in being surrounded by people who share your purpose. It's impossible to do it alone.

Diving Deep

Psychological and mental complexity are not natural states of being. We may have the habit of entertaining the drama that arises from complication, but solutions and transformation happen in the deep, cool waters of a quiet mind. Do you know how to dive deep?

Transcending Fear

There is so much to be afraid of if you spend too much time and energy looking at the world around you, and all the things that don't work, you can't control and you can't fix. And there is so much power, energy and purpose available if you look within. And that's where any real change begins anyway. It's not in the world; it's in us.

The Throne of Self Respect

The one seat you must never leave is the throne of self respect. If you don't feel comfortable there, find someone who does and learn from them. Aligning your thoughts, words, actions and intentions can only start from a place of self-respect.

Jeevanmukti

It is not that spiritual practice frees you from suffering, but it frees you from being defined by your suffering. This distinction makes all the difference.

Forgiveness and Healing

There is no forgiveness without healing first. You cannot be generous with someone who has hurt you until you have some relief from your own pain.

Humility

True humility means accurately valuing the gifts of the spirit we have been blessed with. Not over or undervaluing them, nor pride of ownership. It means understanding that I'm a trustee of these great gifts, and that my greatest joy will always be when I use the gifts I have well, and share them with others.

Full Potential

Are you one of those people who say "I'd like to meditate, but I can't quiet my mind." Or maybe you just fall asleep? Meditation doesn't mean boring emptiness. It is a naturally powerful state of mind. It's not about turning thoughts off, but the way into harnessing their full potential.