Second Chakra

I haven't had a very clear sense of how things would emerge over this period of time, but as things are finally getting clearer, and I'm emerging from this constant state of fuzziness, this I can see for certain: it's not going to end up looking anything like I thought.

I seem to simply feel my way into everything, and as I'm feeling my way into this, it feels so different and new and like I'm completely at home for the first time in eons. Literally - eons. Not figuratively, like, gosh it's been years. But literally. Like maybe lifetimes since I felt this much at home. Since my second chakra stopped spinning out of control in a frenzy of over-stimulation and fear, trying to respond intelligently to an unintelligible threat to the essence of my being. Eons since I didn't get wound up like a spinning top, in an explosion of responsiveness, feeling out of control and unable to slow myself.

I have tried to slow down everything in my life, get it all under control, keep it organized and efficient and moving forward the way I want. Now I'm just focusing more on breathing deeply and letting that lovely chakra, the energy center itself, slow down and become more naturally focused and concentrated without me exerting any kind of force at all. It's a great feeling. Try it next time you feel yourself spinning out of control, and are tempted to impose your will on everything around you. It'll be better for everyone.